9.13.2010
I was thinking,
Maybe sinking,
On the edge of my bed,
I was dreaming,
Maybe screaming,
With a rain cloud overhead.
So if it’s my point,
That I’m afraid you’ll lose me,
Then is it your point,
That you’ll never leave me,
Even if I cry so much,
That I now create my own sea?
Because together we could create,
A world all of our own.
I’ve already got the ocean and it’s tide,
The rain clouds overblown,
I just need your blue skies not to hide,
And the Light that you have shown.
We could let the birds sing their own song,
The squirrels play all day long.
We could watch the fish swim back and forth,
Chase the ducks back to the north,
Help the newborn critters not to fall,
Pray to God in thanks for all.
I was thinking,
Maybe too much,
About the things I miss the most.
I was dreaming,
Maybe too long,
About the things we used to do…
what a beautiful flow…
love the way you rhyme,
extraordinary rhythms…
great,
Glad to see you in…
🙂
[…] Robin: https://robinelizabeth58.wordpress.com/2010/09/15/youll-always-be-week29poetrally/ […]
Very nice.
Nice poem
I read your poem twice. It has such a bond between the two lovers, the agreements they are about to make to each other. Nice.
Maybe writing,
Even Reciting
Isnt this exciting
Your works are Memorizing
Keep it up, your friendly neighborhood shoeless guy 😀
There’s a certain sadness to this poem, but combined with lovely memories.
Victoria
Sad and yearning for something that was. Beautiful job…
I was thinking
What should I be penning
On this rhyming
Poem I was dreaming
atlast I commented a loving
thoughts for this rhymming poem
Rhyming Waters
–Someone Is Special–
There is a sadness here, but also a bond–beautiful stuff, with some lovely rhymes as well.
a very beautiful poem 🙂
i can really understand how you feel. still experiencing it all 🙂
it’s a beautiful feeling acc to me still 😛
your emotions are wonderfully portrayed 🙂
daaaaamn what a flow
beautiful.. the word doesn’t sum up what I feel, but still, it is descriptive 😀 thanks for sharing!
Rally Week 29, My Poem
really, really beautiful. loved the way you flitted between different styles in this 🙂
Excellent write, I loved reading this piece. I like your structure!
this is a beautiful piece. you write so well. welcome to jingle’s community. =)
thanks for visiting my blog and leaving a nice comment. i really appreciate it.
Love the way you make connection between the first and the last part.
And rhymes! I wish I could rhyme as good as you do in this poem.
Keep writing. 🙂
A beautiful poem– yearning for what once was, not satisfied with what is, but wishing for what could be. A sadness squeezed between time frames. Rain clouds, sea, ocean–very descriptive of the depth of emotion. Well done.
A lovely poem. I particularly like the final stanza.
I like it x 1000 🙂
Keep it up 🙂
hope that you find time visiting poets who are here…
Happy Friday!
[…] Robin: https://robinelizabeth58.wordpress.com/2010/09/15/youll-always-be-week29poetrally/ […]
Wanting…almost like wanting a square peg to go through a round hole but a little communication could save so much pain from this thought.
I am glad you said that =D